reminder that it's not anybody's to own but HIS!

so recently i've been muling over the current state of transition our church is in. we have ended the months of pastoral search. we have had a new pastor for about 3 months now. we have gotten to observe some changes at our church. and like everyone else, i believe, i've been kind of holding my breath, watching, evaluating, assessing... now i'm not saying we are simply watching, evaluating and assessing the new pastor... but also watching, evaluating and assessing each other. watching the numbers, noticing who has left, evaluating one another's body language, assessing the new pastor's style, checking out those who have come to support our pastor's new ministry with us... since our church doesn't vote, i believe the body did place their trust in the leadership of the shepherds. however, now that we get to experience the choice in action, i've noticed a lot of self-evaluation going on. and this all came to a peak (there maybe more, it's all dependent on how it's handled i guess) this past weekend when our worship director read her letter of resignation to us during service. don't get me wrong, the service went well. there was no sermon, so people got to share, reflect on thanksgivings, offer prayer requests for the new year, etc... pretty free and easy with familiar favorite worship song intermittenly being lifted up in praise. however, questions have started to swirl... about who will follow... about why she left... yeah she explained that it wasn't with any ill regard or animosity that she left, but still, speculation will exist. it's human nature.

chiyang and i talked about it... we talked about what the church looked like when we came, how it has changed, and what we learned through the relationships we've had and made through it, and also about what we really loved about it. we talked about what we would love to see it become too. but after all that talk... chiyang reminded me gently... by saying, we can say this is how we want our church to look like, or the church is starting to look more like this person's church, or that person's church... but ultimately, the church belongs to God. he's right... i know he is, and i'm so thankful that as much of an engineering mind he has (which means he can sometimes say things in ways he didn't mean to), this time, God really gave him the gentleness i needed that came along with that reminder. at that moment, i wasn't just reminded that our church belonging only to the Lord, but i was also reminded of God's graciousness to me (by giving me my husband). cos God knows best... he's a good man, God-fearing, and amazingly certain that we are where He wants us to be. i'm so grateful for his leadership in my life. submitting to him isn't too hard when i know he's walking in His way.